The Beginning

Date of occurrence : 16-Feb-12


It all began when I answered a requirement for a journal sub posted by a Female Dominant on one of the BDSM sites. From here on I will be refereeing to her as 'Miss'. The application for this post required potential subs to send an email to Miss expressing their interest in the job. There was also a requirement to have an updated journal on the subs own profile so she could the writing abilities of the applicants.

Initially, this seemed like bad news for me. Although I consider myself to be a decent writer when pushed into it, without an active journal it would be difficult to prove to Miss that I was capable to managing this job better than others.

Fortunately, I recalled that I had taken a period of chastity under an online Mistress over 2 years ago. One of the requirements of the online training was that I maintain a journal of my thoughts and feelings for each day under chastity.

I pulled out the journal entries from my archives and posted them on my public journal as part of my application. The journal only started from Day 05 of chastity, but I figured there was enough material to showcase my skills as a writer.

To my delight, I received a reply from her the next day. She was impressed by what I had to offer and awarded me the job. I was obviously very excited about the opportunity and also flattered that she picked me over others that may have applied.

For the benefit of the readers, I am posting my chastity journal here. It is nothing extraordinary. Just some random thoughts and experiences as I went through my chastity training. Hope you enjoy it :)

Chastity Journal

Journal Day 05

I woke up in the middle of the night with a raging erection, but all I could feel was the cage and my shaved balls. The erection subsided and I fell asleep again.

Today, at work from time to time, the cage reminded me that my cock no longer belongs to me. This happens everyday though. Just the thought of no longer having control of my cock makes me hard. I try and relax and the erection subsides. Every time my mind wandered to my situation of chastity, I would get an erection.

Everyday, since my chastity training began, I get home from work and strip completely naked. Since yesterday, I have started leaking some precum..

Also, every time I got to the toilet, I have to go sitting down. As I am not circumcised, I reach into my CB6000 and pull the foreskin out to piss. This does help maintain the device a lot cleaner. At the same though, I am unable to clean inside the foreskin when taking a shower.

Journal Day 06

11:45 PM - Just going through some of the pics I have sent to Mistress as her slave over the last few days. I see the nadu pic and and feel a rush. Looking at myself submitting to her does that to me. I can't help get an erection at the sight.

12:25 AM – Downloaded and watched a golden shower video. Wishing I had a Mistress to piss on my mouth. Another frustrating erection to deal with.

02:00 AM – Woke up in the middle of the night with an erection. Feeling very horny as I pull my legs to my chest almost as if getting ready for someone to pound that ass. Within moments, I come to my senses and realise I am all locked up. I settle down and go back to sleep

04:00 AM – Another erection and I cant help myself. I get up and get to the computer and am very lucky to see Mistress come online in a few moments. Mistress gets me to run the cam so she can inspect her cock. I am glad to have pleased Mistress with my chastity tasks so far. Unfortunately, Mistress has had some family emergency. I wish Mistress and her family all the best. In the meantime, I will continue to be a good slave for her and will wait for her to return on Mon.

05:00 AM - Trying to catch some more sleep before I have to get ready for work. I sleep with a very deep sense of satisfaction. Having pleased Mistress over our chat session, gives me immense satisfaction.

08:15 AM – At work, thinking of the task assigned by Mistress to complete over the weekend. Another erection. Every thought of Mistresses ownership and control over me gives me an erection.

11:00 AM – Sitting at my desk at work, my mind wanders away. Mistress will not be in available until Monday. Although she has given me instructions and assignments to keep me busy until Monday, I am wondering if she will be online briefly to post further instructions or perhaps review the submitted assignments. Everyday, since the training started, I have been getting home from work and the first thing I do is login to messenger and check my offline messages for instructions. I will miss these messages for the next couple of days, but I must not be selfish. Mistress has something important to take care of and I offer my good wishes to her. All this thought has given me another uncomfortable erection.

06:50 PM – Being an excessive masturbator over the last many years, I have sort of an addiction to porn. I can't help getting a daily dose of porn. Even though it is frustrating, I have been watching kinky/bdsm porn from day one of being locked up. It does give me frustrating erections and the tip of my foreskin peeks out of CB6000. I play with the tip of the foreskin as that is all I have access to. Securely locked in my chastity I feel safe that there will be no accident. However, today I had a scare, I almost came just from the stimulation of the very tip of the foreskin. I couldn't believe I was getting close to an orgasm just by such minimal stimulation. I guess, it is the effect of not cumming for the last 6 days, especially since, leading up to my chastity period, I had been cumming almost daily (sometimes twice a day). I was able to gather enough self control to stop and not cum. Mistress has been very pleased with my progress so far and I am not going to ruin it by cumming without permission (even though I am still locked).

07:30 PM – Coming so close to an orgasm has triggered the leakage of a lot of precum. Of course I lick all that I can possibly squeeze out out of Mistresses locked cock. Following the earlier scare, I really need to be careful with Mistresses cock.

Journal - Day 07

11:25 PM – Watching a foreign language movie. Not sure what language it is. The movie has a lot of sex scenes. I can’t help getting frequent erections. My foreskin has sort of desensitised. So, even though I am still playing with, I am not getting anywhere near as excited about it as I did earlier yesterday.

01:00 AM – erection in the middle of the night wakes me up. Take a walk around my house and go back to bed

04:14 AM – another erection brings me awake. I sit down at the computer and luckily for me Mistress signs in a couple mins later. She and I have good chat. I am really pleased to have had a chat with her. We talk about many things, including my progress so far, our picks for the NFL.

Back to bed now. Try and get some more sleep.

06:00 AM – Yet another erection breaks my sleep.

Back to sleep.

01:00 PM – I think about what Mistress said earlier today about any begging and crying not having any effect. Ironically, it gives an erection. I really must get “used to it” as Mistress said.

06:00 PM – I just realised, this Day 7 of my Chastity. This is the longest I can remember having gone without cumming. I wonder how long I will have to go...or rather how long I can go. At the moment though, I am feeling rather calm. My CB6000 seems to be becoming a part of me...At-least when I am naked at home.

Journal - Day 08

01:15 AM – Watching porn again. The video is of 2 Mistress and 2 slave. One slave is being fucked by a strap on while he suck the cock of the slave in front of him. The slave in front is licking the second Mistresses pussy. I get so hard seeing this. I really don't know which slave I would like to be.

06:30 AM – An erection breaks my sleep.

10:30 AM – Although Mistress was kind enough to say that any household item like a spatula, belt etc will be good enough for the spankings, I want to do it right for Mistress. Just bought three paddles. The first one is a long thin paddle in white. The other two are round paddles...one in black, and one in white. The delivery could take a week to 10 days, so perhaps for our first spanking, I will have to do with a wig brush that I have.

11:15 AM – Some more precum for me :)

11:45 PM – Watching porn again and using my vibrator to tease Mistress' cock. Again, I get that feeling I am going to cum. I am tempted to keep going. I try to push myself to the edge before stopping. I stop. But I pushed myself too far. Even though I stopped stimulating Mistress' cock, it has been taken beyond the point of no return. I feel the cum building inside and am in despair. I am not stimulating anymore, however, the cum is still building. And then to my horror, I cum.

I am so disappointed with myself. I signed up for Mistresses' training to curb my excessive masturbation. The only personal consolation I have is that I went a week without cumming. Before training I could not go a single day without cumming. Even so, this is not going to earn me any sympathy with Mistress.

I am so sorry Mistress. I know you have been really pleased with my progress so far, but I have let you down today. I know I don't  deserve forgiveness for this.

01:15 PM – I am watching the NFL playoffs. I check on the scores and see the Jets have won. Atleast I wont be punished for that. At this time, the Cowboys are leading. Another one of my picks.

03:30 PM – Cowboys win!! That's 2 out of 2 wins for me. I just wish I had more control over myself and had not cum. Cumming without permissions has really dampened my spirits quite a bit. To add to my misery, Mistress is away and will not return until Monday. It is going to be along and anxious wait for me until I get feedback from Mistress about my grave mistake.

Journal - Day 09

06:10 AM – no erections

Journal - Day 10

09:00 PM – Not an eventful day today. Just sitting naked except for my chastity cage of course.

11:00 PM – Still feeling anxious about the punishment I will have to endure for my mistake. Haven't had any erections today

03: 00 AM – Woke up with an erection. Quickly subsides and I am back to sleep.

04:15 am – Another erection...feeling a bit uncomfortable today...perhaps a cleaning day needs to be organized with Mistress.

05:00 PM – Just got home from work. A little disappointed to see that there is no message from Mistress. I guess Mistress is very busy. I am just disappointed in the fact that there is no message, not disappointed with her in any way. I have just gotten used to her instructions and tasks and anxiously await them every day.

Journal - Day 11

11:00 PM – Watched porn for the first time today. Naturally, it gave me an erection. Ever since the accident, I have been careful to watch less and only watch for a short period.

00:30 AM – Erection wakes me up

Journal - Day 12

10:00 PM – Received an email from Mistress that the family emergency she was dealing with a couple of days ago is taking up a lot of her time and energy. She is therefore unable to continue training at this point in time. She is very please with my obedience (despite the accident). She lets me know that I am always welcome back to future chastity training under her. I thank her for her time and effort spent in monitoring my chastity. She gives me permission to unlock and I am very thankful for that.

I am glad to be released. After nearly 2 weeks, my cock finally tastes some freedom.

 For your viewing pleasure, here is a picture showing proof of my chastity. This was one of the first of many pictures I sent to my online Mistress during the course of the training.